Worst day of my life

Today was most definitely the worst day of my life. I’ve decided to not use my weblog for personal matters, but this is an exception. Partly because I’ve talked on Twitter and MSN with a lot of folks about the pregnancy lately and partly because I need to spill my guts out on what happened. And maybe keep this for personal records so I can look up what happened in the future.

Last week, on Tuesday, my wife was taken to the hospital because of some stuff that doesn’t need to be mentioned here. It was because of high blood pressure. They kept her from Tuesday until Thursday and monitored her occasionally if everything was alright again. The send her home with an appointment for Monday morning to recheck if everything was alright.

This night, from Sunday to Monday, my wife felt a little pressure on her chest. We went to bed and a little later, around 12:00am she woke up because of the pain in her chest. She was really, really worried and told me I had to call the hospital. She had trouble breathing also. The hospital confirmed we should come.

So some time before 01:00am we arrived at the hospital and things started getting worse very rapidly. See hard major pain in the chest, constant pressure and had a hard time breathing. At some point the nurses were away, organizing stuff and I had the idea she fainted repeatedly. So I went to search for a nurse and a few minutes later four nurses gathered around my wife.

They then transported her to the delivery room because they have equipment there to monitor her and the baby. They gave her an intravenous for her high blood pressure. But the pain and breathing problems got worse and worse. They gave her an injection for the pain at around 02:00am for the pain, which seemed to really start kicking in around 02:30am. But instead of just removing the pain, it looked like she was seriously drugged. She spoke everything double (doublespeak) and didn’t respond very well to inquiries from either me nor the nurses.

At around 06:00am or so she had slept for almost the entire time. Occasionally she puked and spoke with doublespeak but almost immediately fell asleep afterwards. But at this time, the heartbeat of the baby started to faint. So the gynecologist was called and he arrived 15 minutes later or so. He felt the baby was asleep because of the drugs (the injection for the pain) and tried to wake it up. The heartbeat rose again, but he decided ten minutes later they’d do a Caesarean section after all.

They prepared her, moved her away to surgery and I had to put on some clothes so I could be with her. When I came in, no communication was possible with my wife at all. The baby was delivered and while I was with the baby, someone came in mentioning they noticed something and would put her to sleep. Also because she might choke in her own vomit if so would throw up again.

I went with the baby to the maternity ward where after a short time, the doctor came in mentioning my wife was put to sleep because she had a Intracranial hemorrhage.

I can tell you, my life came almost to a full stop at that moment.

I was later informed that she had two major intracranial hemorrhages and they needed to transfer her to Erasmus MC, a specialized hospital in Rotterdam. Multiple doctors went with the ambulance and the ambulance itself got police support to get there as quick as possible.

I’m now at home, ready to see my other three children who are at my brother-in-law. I went to Erasmus MC myself to check on my wife. She was in a three hour surgery where they removed a part of her skull and fixed one intracranial hemorrhage. The other was too deep into her brain to reach. The operation was successful, if you can call it that.

I’m going to the hospital tomorrow to check on my wife. She’s kept asleep right now with medication. They’ll stop the medication tomorrow and then we’ll have to wait and see if she’ll ever gain consciousness again. And if she does, in what state that will be.

Still in the first hospital is my new born daughter Marith, who might never know her mother. I’m seriously constantly praying if she will be alright, as He is the only one who can help her now.